Why should people still be Smiths
When metalwork's a dying art?
Why not pick a name that fits,
The way that Ringo is a Starr?

So, Shanks the runner, Jones the junkie,
Green the environmentalist,
Wright the author, Toad the flunky;
Thatcher's one that won't be missed.

But some old names still work just fine,
Like Robin-son from Robin-dad :
On Monday mornings, five past nine,
Start the Week with Melvyn Bragg.